A notion to eliminate the contraction 'They're'

I hereby would like to set forth a second notion of elimination of the excess within the English language, regarding contractions. Contractions are the epitome of laziness both in speech and writing. Nothing--and I mean nothing-- is worse than a formal paper or article with a contraction thrown in the mix. I would rather see a spelling error. Do not even get me started on writing out contractions and not including the necessary apostrophe, i.e. dont. That level of sloppiness does not even belong in text messages.
Though contractions can, at times, be convenient in daily speech, I believe a notion could be set in to place to eliminate them. This is quite a bold statement, and though I do not fear making a bold statement, I have decided to hone in on the first of many problems: They're.
Now, there are plenty of other contractions that I am not particularly fond of, i.e. She'd, you'll, you've, however those will have to be tackled at another point in time. The real conundrum with 'they're' that other contractions do not have in common is what I like to call it's (heads up: that is pocessive of 'it', not a contraction for 'it is') sister words, there and their.
'They're' not only creates a more confused society, but then brings it's members down because of it. I firmly believe that we should not be a society that conforms to the stupidity of it's weaker members, and therefore I am not suggesting that we eliminate 'They're' because people are not smart enough for it, although this is a suggestion that could be argued for. It is more that I am what I like to refer to as a 'simpilist'. I believe that we should keep our language as simple as possible. 'They're' is excessive, much like the letter 'C'. It does not need to be used, as 'they are' suffices just fine and is just as easily said in everyday speech. This can be argued of all contractions, but 'they're' is almost more difficult to say than 'they are', because of the awkward jamming of consonant sounds with the letters 'Y' and 'R'. 'They're' is the most confusing word of the 'there, thier, they're' sisterhood, and therefore should be the first of the terminated contractions.

Dear Sri Lanka,

I miss everything about you.
I miss how you smell--so distinct and unlike anywhere I've ever been. As if curry and sweat are just as much ingredients to the atmosphere as oxygen.
I miss how every tree bears a coconut. The palm trees here seem to be missing the orange pizazz that yours posess.
I miss the roads and the crazy agressive driving. All business. Everyone drives with a purpose.
I miss the dogs that have the right of way, and know what a honking horn means.
I miss "Sri Lanka time" and how you never know what time people really mean.
I miss your delicious tea that makes me feel at home 9500 miles away.
I miss the dark skin, small frames, and quiet voices of the people.
I miss the "hot grams" and papaya.
I miss the Chilaw city hotel, and the staff who work there every day, all day.
I miss the girls.
I miss Grace and Bridgette's awesome cooking.
I miss Seneka.
I miss spending every waking moment with an awesome team.
Sri Lanka I just wish I was with you right now. I will return to you, but until then we have our memories together.